In almost every school I visit, you see the same core values posted on the walls: Respect, Responsibility, Safety, Excellence. These are great concepts, but when you watch how they get enforced in a crowded hallway or classroom, they often turn into a lot of adults yelling commands like, “Listen! Focus! Respect our sanity!”
By the time a kid reaches middle school, they have heard those negative commands a thousand times. The problem is that traditional rules tell kids what not to do, or they demand compliance without giving kids an active way to practice it.
When we work with school districts on PBIS, or Positive Behavioral Interventions and Supports, the goal is always Tier 1 prevention. That means building a positive, school-wide environment where good behavior is proactive, predictable, and shared by everyone.
If you want an active, battle-tested framework for Tier 1 PBIS that actually works, you do not need a complicated behavioral chart. You just need what I call The New Golden Rule.
Rethinking “Do Unto Others”
We all grew up with the traditional Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
It is a fine concept, but in today’s world, it is simply not active enough. “Doing unto others” leaves too much room for passive behavior. I like to reframe it for students and teachers like this: Lead by example with a smile. Lead with fun, and most people will come along for the ride.
When you lead with fun and active support, you change the energy of a room instantly. But to make sure that fun does not turn into chaos or classroom disruption, we anchor everything in our three foundational rules.
Our Three #1 Rules in Action
- Rule #1: HAVE FUN, but NEVER at another’s expense (Tier 1 PBIS and Community Norms)
This is the core boundary of everything we do. In a world filled with online roasting and cheap snark, kids often think being funny means tearing someone else down. We shut that down from minute one. By making it clear that humor must uplift the group rather than target an individual, we establish a firm, proactive PBIS norm. It keeps the classroom safe, low-stakes, and focused on shared storytelling. - Rule #1 in Improv: YES, AND… (Psychological Safety and Relationship Skills)
“Yes, And” is the ultimate tool for positive behavior. It means accepting what your teammate brings to the table and adding your own positive contribution. When students know their ideas will be accepted rather than shut down, their defensive walls come down. They stop worrying about looking foolish and start working together. - Rule #1 in Life: LISTEN! (Executive Functioning and Emotional Intelligence)
Real respect is not just keeping your mouth shut while someone else talks. Real respect is listening with your eyes. Improv requires 90% listening. It forces students to pay attention to body language, hold information in mind, and adapt in real time. That is executive functioning in its purest form.
Why “Never at Another’s Expense” Works Better Than Punishment
When I do corporate team building or professional development workshops with teachers, I remind them that kids are stuck in the middle. Up until they turn 18, you can only fault kids so much for where they are at emotionally or mentally. They are absorbing all the pressure, stress, and noise of the world around them.
When an adult standing in front of the room leads with impatience or frustration, kids put up a wall. But when you establish a firm rule that we are going to have a blast without putting anyone down, the dynamic shifts.
I have seen this in action thousands of times over the last 20 years, whether we are doing an assembly for 500 elementary kids, hosting a workshop in Harlem or the Bronx, or running professional development for 60 preschool teachers at once. People do not want to be lectured at or tested on their behavior. They want to laugh, and they want to feel supported by the people around them.
The Takeaway for School Leaders
Building a strong PBIS culture is not about creating more penalties for bad behavior. It is about creating a space where positive connection is irresistible.
When you set a clear boundary that fun can never come at someone else’s expense, and when you back it up with games that require active listening and support, discipline problems naturally drop. The kids are too busy keeping the play going to worry about picking on each other.
Want to bring an interactive assembly, school residency, or teacher professional development workshop to your district? Head over to Improv4Kids.com or NewYorkImprovTheater.com to see how our programs align with your PBIS and SEL goals.
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